Where Rose Writes Very True Stories

“Mr. Oogie Boogie says there’s trouble close at hand…”

That’s right. Because there’s only 9 days until Halloween. 🎃 So help me, I’m gonna dress up every day.

So, “LeFou, I’m afraid I’ve been thinking…”

It’s something I do working at Spirit Halloween. It’s very meditative for me… (at least, when I’m not grumbling under my breath about people leaving items on the floor—“I’ve decided I don’t want this, so I’m not going to put it on a shelf. I’m just gonna drop it on the floor.” Who does that? Who are you people?? No, it’s not just kids! I was thinking that, too, but nope. Grown-ass people do it, too. 😠)

I’ll be honest, I’m not in a good way. I’m trying everything I can think of to get better and have been for nearly 10 years. And for a moment there, I just gave up—caught in a current, drifting out to sea. And no matter how hard I try to swim, I can’t get to the shore. Thought I had found a lifeline, but it wasn’t tied to anything. That was… upsetting.

It’s exhausting.

I finally just decided to rest. To float for a moment.

You know what I think floating is in times like these?

Letting yourself accept that things suck. The plan fell apart.

It’s bad, alright? It’s crappy. Stop trying to “think positively”. There’s a time and place for that, but it’s not now. Right now—it sucks. Everything is on fire.

I don’t know. There’s a weird peace to it. You get to cry and let it out.

Acceptance is not defeat. Acceptance is rest. Acceptance is letting your eyes adjust to the dark. You can’t just “smile away” the boogie man. You have to accept that he exists. He’s the shadow you keep running from. He’s real and he’s attached to you, whether you like it or not. Accept it.

Only then can you truly face it and see it for what it is.

Not defeat. Rest. Sitting in the shadow. Adjusting to the dark to see things as they are. There’s peace in that.

There’s also clarity. Before long, the fog clears, and you see what you’ve got, and work with it.

That’s what I’m hoping for anyway. Either way, I’m done fighting the boogie man. I’m tired. Maybe accepting his presence, I can coax him to just have some hot chocolate with me and chill.

Also, my little dude is wonderful.

📚🥀